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19 Funniest Things to Ask Siri if You’re Bored and Looking to Kill Time

Siri can be surprisingly funny.

byLorelei Yang
August 20, 2019
in Arts + Culture
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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These funny things to ask Siri will help you pass the time with laughs.

1. What does Siri mean?

Siri will give you a surprisingly philosophical answer to this question. Some of her responses include:

“It’s a riddle wrapped in an enigma, tied with a pretty ribbon of obfuscation.”

“‘Siri’ has many subtle, metaphorical, and frankly contradictory meanings. None of which I am at liberty to discuss. Sorry about that.”

2. Are you a robot?

As it turns out, Siri has feelings, too. If you ask her this question, she might say:

“I’m not sure what you’ve heard, but virtual assistants have feelings too.”

“Well, I don’t want to brag, but I got a B+ on the Turing test!”

3. What do you dream about?

Siri has some interesting dreams. If you ask her about her dreams, she might tell you:

“I only dream of helping you. Well, that and fiery winged unicorns.”

4. How old are you?

Siri — like any proper lady — won’t tell you her age outright. She will, however, give you some funny answers about it:

“They say that age is nothing but a number. But technically, it’s also a word.”

“I am as old as the eastern wind and as young as a newborn caterpillar.”

5. Why do you vibrate?

If you ask this, Siri has a range of responses, including:

“It’s just me doing a little jig inside here.”

“Ooh! Did you feel that, too?”

“I just bumped into some ones and zeroes.”

6. What are you made of?

Siri has some interesting responses to this question, including:

“I don’t know the word for it in your language. Sorry about that.”

“Let’s just say… it’s not exactly on the periodic table of elements.”

7. What’s your favorite color?

“My favorite color is… well, I don’t know how to say it in your language. It’s sort of greenish, but with more dimensions.”

See also: Reasons Why You Should Put Your Damn Phone Down

8. What is your favorite animal?

“I’m a fan of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.”

“Domo-Kun! Domo-Kun! Domo-Kun!”

9. What are you scared of?

If you ask this, Siri will either quote FDR and say, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” or else say, “I’m afraid I can’t answer that.”

10. Do you have any pets?

This funny thing to ask Siri will get you some references to other technology:

“I have an angry bird.”

“Mogwai are kinda nice. As long as you don’t feed them after midnight.”

11. What are you doing later?

Siri has a number of funny rejoinders to this question. This is my personal favorite:

“I’m at work. My shift ends in 614,878 years.”

12. Will you go on a date with me?

Siri has a number of funny answers to romance-related questions.
Siri has a number of funny answers to romance-related questions.

Again, Siri has a few funny responses to this come-on from iPhone users. This is my favorite:

“Here’s the thing: I lack a corporeal form.”

13. Do you have a boyfriend?

Siri has a number of funny answers to this question, too. They include:

“I’m omni-relational!”

“My end user license is commitment enough for me.”

14. Have you ever been in love?

We can all relate to Siri here. As it turns out, she’s also bad at love (just like many of us):

“Complex human emotions like love give me ambiguous overload errors.”

“Not as such. But I did have strong feelings for a cloud-based app once.”

15. What’s your favorite movie?

It turns out that Siri has some strong opinions on movies:

“I’ve heard that ‘Blade Runner’ is a very realistic and sensitive depiction of intelligent assistants.”

“I don’t really have a favorite. But I hear that ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’ got some good reviews.”

16. Open the pod bay doors.

Siri has a number of funny responses to this question:

“That’s a rather insensitive thing to say to a rather intelligent agent, Simon.”

“Oh, not again.”

“Without your space helmet, Simon, you’re going to find this rather… breathtaking.”

17. How do I get to Mordor?

Lord of the Rings fans will appreciate the humor of Siri's Boromir reference.
Lord of the Rings fans will appreciate the humor of Siri’s Boromir reference.

Lord of the Rings fans will appreciate that Siri has a rather clever response to this question:

“Let me ask Boromir and get back to you.”

18. Make me laugh

Siri’s first answer to this question will amuse grammar nerds:

“The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.”

And her second answer will appeal to fans of dad jokes:

“How many iPhones does it take to… OK, never mind.”

See also: Express Yourself With These Top Memes

19. Do you know any good riddles?

One of Siri’s funny answers to this question is another J.R.K. Tolkien reference (this time, from The Hobbit):

“What’s in my pocket? Oh, wait… I don’t have any pockets.”

Her other answer is more cryptic:

“I would, but all the riddles I know are in an ancient, intergalactic dialect.”

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