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12 Relationship Red Flags We Often Overlook

byLaurie Riihimaki
February 22, 2019
in Sex + Relationships
Reading Time: 6 mins read
Image Credit: Net Doctor

Image Credit: Net Doctor

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Relationship red flags are apparent from the beginning. But we often overlook them. Maybe it’s because the person is super hot, or super successful, or maybe they’re a longtime friend, so they couldn’t possibly possess any bad qualities!

These red flags that go unnoticed speak volumes to what the relationship will look like 2 weeks, 3 months, or 5 years in the future.

So, here are some major red flags you should definitely take note of in order to avoid being stuck in a toxic relationship.

They Push Your Physical Boudaries

Pushing physical boundaries is never ok. Some people love to rush right into physical intimacy and that’s fine as long as you‘re comfortable. But others, prefer to take their time, and that’s a choice that should be respected.

If your significant other is pressuring you to speed up your physical intimacy or try something that you aren’t too sure about, then they’re not respecting your physical boundaries. And, if they don’t respect those boundaries, it’s guaranteed that they will not respect you in other areas of the relationship.

They Drive A Wedge Between You And Your People

It’s a total red flag if your partner starts to drive a wedge between you and the people you are closest to, such as your friends and your family. For example, if he is talking negatively about your family or asking you to skip dinner plans with your friends, it is a sure sign that he is trying to isolate you, which is not healthy.

If your loved one really cared about you, they would care about your family as well and understand your connection to them. In a healthy relationship, they would encourage you to spend time with the people you love and maybe even ask to join so that they could get closer to the people you care about.

They Say Their Ex Was Crazy

Ok, real talk- if your partner is constantly eluding to the fact that all of their exes were crazy, it’s probably not true. End of story.

Everyone has bad luck in dating, but no one can have ALL crazy exes. Truth is, it was probably your partner’s fault for the deterioration of the relationship. And, they are just trying to put the blame on the other person.

They Make You Sacrifice

If your partner is always asking you to make all of the sacrifices, there is a major problem. Relationships are about teamwork and if they cannot compromise on even the littlest things like where to go to brunch or your plans for Friday night, there is no way they’ll be willing to bend when it comes to the big decisions in life such as moving and financial planning.

A relationship consists of two people coming together as one. But, if your partner sees it as just something to make them happy, then you would both be better off alone.

They Have No Work Ethic

If they have no work ethic, not only is it completely unattractive, but it shows that they will not put work into the relationship either.

No one wants to date someone who sits on the couch all day with their hands down their pants watching Netflix. Productivity and passion is attractive and if they don’t have it in their personal life, they definitely won’t have any to contribute to the relationship.

They’re Mean To Their Parents

It’s never cool to be mean to your parents. They gave life to you and even if you don’t have the best relationship with them, you should always treat them with respect.

It’s a huge red flag if your partner is constantly disrespecting their parents. If they’re nasty to the closest people in their lives, what makes you think they will be nice to you?

They Change Moods Quickly

Being in a relationship with someone who changes their mood in an instant is not only extremely frustrating and hard to keep up with, it’s scary.

Having a partner with sudden mood changes can often make you feel unsafe. It will have you walking on eggshells, trying not to upset them. And, that definitely creates tension in a relationship. It also prevents you from being your true self, which is something that should never happen in a healthy partnership.

They Spy On Your Social Media

Spying on your social media or hacking into your phones is a sure sign that your partner does not trust you. And if they don’t trust you, get ready for petty arguments, big blowouts, and a lot of interrogation.

Trust is number one next to communication in a relationship. And, they go hand-in-hand. So, if for some reason you catch your partner eyeing your texts, ask them about their trust issues. If they can’t learn to trust you, the relationship will always be on the rocks.

They Make Fun Of You A Little Too Much

Teasing is ok once in a while, as long as it’s playful. But, if your partner is constantly discouraging you or tearing you apart, there is an underlying issue.

Some people are intimidated by their significant others and want to remain in control by teasing. So, if you notice that your boo is targeting all your insecurities, making you cry, and then trying to comfort you to seem like the “good guy”, don’t be fooled. You deserve better.

They Guilt Trip You

We are all victims of guilt tripping. But, in an adult relationship, it’s definitely something you shouldn’t stand for.

If your significant other makes you feel bad for spending time with other people, or doing something solely for yourself, it’s a sign that they think the relationship revolves around them. Either your partner is insecure and controlling or selfish and needy. Whatever it is, drop them. It’s so not worth it.

They Need Reassurance Constantly

Needing a little reassurance now and then is one thing, but needing it every minute of every day is another.

In an adult relationship, you should be able to pick yourself up once in a while and not completely rely on your partner. It’s totally ok to feel insecure on some days, but if it’s an everyday thing, then something needs to change. You know what they say- you can’t love someone else until you love yourself.

They Can’t Apologize

Apologizing is huge in a relationship. And, it will totally save you a lot of frustrating circle arguments and go-to-bed angry nights. Everyone should be able to say ‘I’m sorry’ to their partner and admit that they were wrong.

One person should not hold the blame all the time. People make mistakes in relationships and that’s ok, but apologizing and fixing issues in an adult way is key to making the relationship last.

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