Let’s be honest, breaking up can be brutal, not only to the heart but the mind and the body. And people cope in different ways, here are some fun and self-care options to get over a bad breakup. But one thing to keep in mind, just because a relationship didn’t work out doesn’t mean you are damaged goods or a loser. Always remember, never a loss, always a lesson.
1. Pray
For yourself, your health, your peace, and your sanity. A failed relationship can take a lot out of you, so you want to ask to be replenished with all the nutrients necessary for you to go on with life. And if you’re really mature, pray for your ex. Jhene Aiko has a song called Pray For You that’s very becoming as she talks about praying for her ex to getting everything she couldn’t give to him. That’s another level of maturity, but in time we all ultimately just want to be happy. Choose happy over petty.
2. Boss Up
Keeping yourself busy is by far one of the best things you can do to move forward when you end a relationship. Focusing on your dream, job, career, or dream job will make the time pass quicker, ease your mind, and lift your spirits. It will also keep you clear from depression and thinking of your ex non-stop. When you boss up that means your focus is your bag, and when your bag is secured so is your independence!
3. Evaluate
Find the takeaways from ending a relationship. There are pros and cons to every relationship and much to be learned as well. Instead of seeing only the negative aspect, try finding the good things that you learned from that person, or what you learned about yourself. Nonetheless, each relationship makes you better as it is merely a lesson in one chapter of your life.
4. Allow yourself time to heal
Don’t rush into a new relationship for the sake of making your ex jealous, proving a point, or upkeep a facade for Instagram none of these people matter. If you never face the issues at hand, they will still fester. Also, excessive alcohol and drug use don’t help either, it’s best to face your reality, it’s the best way to look yourself in the mirror and focus on yourself.
5. Celebrate
Partying with your friends is always a great way to get your mind off of a terrible break-up, You could go to a club/lounge, have a kick-back at your house or have a Zoom party (with the pandemic going on). Every ending isn’t for the worst, sometimes it’s for you to level up, look at Ciara. Ending a relationship for her was the best decision for her as it turned out.
6. Spend Time Alone
This is by far the most important. Some say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone, but that only creates more problems. Allow yourself time to grieve the loss, focus on yourself and your own peace and happiness. Let this time be one of self-reflection, self-awareness, and love from within as relationships tend to make you question your worth.
7. Cut the cord
When you’re in a relationship, most times you get close with their friends and family, but with the breakup, these people must get cut off as well. They aren’t your ally, cut ties early to spare yourself further heartbreak.
8. Press Delete
Erase that person on all social media outlets. The relationship is over so there’s no need to see what’s going on in their world, or the facade they’re putting up for your viewership. Let it go, for your own sanity.
9. Replace
Out with the old in with the new! Rid yourself with all things that remind you of your ex. I’m talkin’ clothes, shoes, pictures, you name it. But don’t be a fool, things that are valuable like jewelry, cars and other sorts shouldn’t be tampered with. Keep the gold, let go of the mold!
10. Get back out there, gradually
After you’ve given yourself some time to regroup, start shopping! You don’t have to put yourself on the market displaying a single sign, but a few dates here and there never hurt anyone. Plus, who doesn’t like dressing up and getting cute? Be open to all forms of meeting new people–blind dates, speed dating, a friend of a friend, or referrals. After all, love has no restrictions to an open mind, remember that.
Hopefully, these tips help in some way to get you started in the right direction of moving forward from ending a relationship. There is always beauty at the end of every situation because it gives you a chance to start anew. Keep your head lifted, you never know when you’ll spot the next potential bae!